Sports: Lessons in Leadership
I may not be an Olympic-level athlete…
BUT... I LOVE sports.
As a child, I was encouraged to participate in team sports. This instilled in me a commitment to the greater good—a "good" rooted in dedication to the team, the team's vision, and our collective goals.
I remember, as a secondary student, having to choose between two sports as a representative athlete. The skills required for both were complementary. I'm glad that we've moved beyond this limitation. At that time, I believed there was a place and time for pushing the boundaries of conventional thought; however, going it alone was not ideal. This was neither the time nor the context in which I had the support to challenge the status quo. While I was determined, as a teenager, I lacked self-confidence.
I then sustained a major injury in my chosen sport. Despite having a world-leading surgeon, there was no psychological support to help me push past it. The great Michael Jones was my benchmark. I would watch his progress and model my own journey after his, albeit without professional support. What I learned was that with determination, information gathering, and commitment, you can achieve things beyond expectations.
I then switched sports. I learned new skills while transferring the grit and resilience from my previous experiences into my new pursuits. I was doing well. I had the determination, responsiveness, and coaching from some of the best in the business. But then I faced another major challenge that sidelined me for a couple of years. During this time, I developed deep grit, focus, and the ability to overcome adversity, stand up for myself, and learn many transferable skills.
Over a 20-year period, I was involved in various other sports, mostly in a teaching capacity and sometimes competitively.
As my family grew up and my life expanded, I discovered a newfound yearning to be part of a team while also pushing my personal boundaries. This included trekking to some of the highest parts of the world. I absolutely loved it.
And now, here I am today, at age 54, ready for new adventures that combine elements of my past with new perspectives. This is a story yet to be written.
But what has all of this taught me about leadership?
I believe an equation sums it up:
(IS + TS) ES = PO
Individual strengths + Team strengths X Expert strengths = Powerful Outcomes
When individuals maximise their potential and the team harnesses these strengths, and then you bring in the expertise to mould and amplify them, you achieve powerful outcomes.
So, my question to you is, how are you amplifying each part of the equation to build powerful outcomes for those you serve?
I love working alongside those striving for powerful outcomes. I support organisations in amplifying these elements for their own powerful outcomes. 2025 is on my horizon. Let me know if you want to push the boundaries of the status quo, amplify momentum, and plan for the possibilities in your context
I’m excited to be launching our 2025 programmes soon. If you want to get a jump-start on your PLD planning, drop me a line.
Time may not be the enemy.
Mary-Anne Murphy
One thing I often hear in my mahi is the phrase, “We don’t have enough time.”
I admit, I sometimes feel the same way. Just thinking about our workload can make our stomachs knot, our hearts race, and even trigger a flight, fight, or freeze response. We might do anything but the work at hand, leaving us with a perfectly tidy office and no actual work done. Or we might complain about how much we do compared to others or about the relentless flow of tasks from above, like a fire hydrant that won’t shut off. And sometimes, we just procrastinate… and do nothing at all.
Time is a tricky subject…
So, I decided to take matters into my own hands. As Michael Altschuler says, “The bad news is time flies. The good news is you’re the pilot.” I looked at how I was working and where I might be wasting time to see how much control I actually had over my time.
I started to notice when I got side-tracked by my phone, got caught in long-winded break conversations, started doing other tasks like reading emails without answering any, or got stuck in my own mind trying to figure out how to do something.
What I discovered, aside from some distractive tendencies, was that I could be spending my time more purposefully.
So, I researched methods to help me focus better. I came across the Pomodoro Technique. Here’s how it works:
[Reference: https://todoist.com/productivity-methods/pomodoro-technique]
I found that it’s amazing what can be achieved in 25 minutes! I can stay focused for that long, achieve a lot when I concentrate on one task at a time, and I feel energized.
I set a timer on my phone, then put it aside or in a drawer to avoid distractions. I don’t look at it until the timer goes off.
Even better, this technique can work for children, especially those who struggle with focus. You could try it at your next staff professional learning day or even with a class of students.
At the International Conference of Thinking in Melbourne, I heard neuroscientist Dr. Mark Williams discuss this. Listen to his podcast interview here to capture some of the gems he shared.
So, if you feel like time isn’t on your side, consider how you could use it more effectively. Maybe even give the Pomodoro Technique a whirl… you have nothing to lose by trying.
Can AI Truly Mimic Human Emotional Intelligence?
Mary-Anne Murphy
When presenting at the recent International Conference on Thinking in Melbourne, I was fortunate to hear many incredible speakers. Topics ranged from ancient wisdoms, neuroscience, medicine and artificial intelligence. Throughout the conference, conversations were bubbling about the convergence of Artificial Intelligence (AI) and humanity. One such question that has been bubbling for me, is Can AI ever really understand and mimic human emotional intelligence (EI)? You know, that unique human ability to recognize, understand, and manage emotions. So I thought, why not write a thought piece to explore this question.
The Complexity of Human Emotional Intelligence.
First off, let's break down what emotional intelligence actually is. It's not just about being able to tell when someone is happy or sad. Emotional intelligence, as explained by Martyn Newman, includes self-awareness, self-regulation, motivation, empathy, and social skills. It's about understanding your own emotions, empathising with others, and handling social situations with finesse.
Think about it—self-awareness means you can tap into your own feelings and understand what you're experiencing. AI, on the other hand, doesn't have personal experiences or a consciousness to tap into. It's like trying to explain colors to someone who’s never seen them.
Empathy is another biggie. It's not just recognizing that someone is upset; it's feeling a bit of their pain, understanding their perspective. AI might be able to recognize emotional cues, but it doesn't "feel" anything. It can simulate empathy, but it's not the same as genuinely sharing someone else's emotions.
Current Capabilities of AI in Simulating Emotional Intelligence.
AI has come a long way, though. Today, AI can analyze facial expressions, tone of voice, and even text to guess what you're feeling. Ever talked to a customer service bot that seemed to understand your frustration? That's AI trying its best to be emotionally intelligent.
In mental health apps, AI can monitor your mood and suggest activities to boost your spirits. These advancements show that AI can mimic some aspects of emotional intelligence, making our interactions with technology feel more human.
Limitations of AI in Mimicking Human EI.
But let’s not get carried away. There are some pretty big limitations. For one, AI doesn’t have consciousness. It doesn’t have personal experiences, so it can’t understand the full context of your emotions. It's like trying to understand a novel by only reading a summary—you miss out on the depth and details.
AI learns from data, which is great for spotting patterns but not so great for understanding nuances. For example, it might recognize that you're sad because you're crying, but it won't get why you’re sad. Maybe you're crying because you lost a loved one, or maybe because you just watched a touching movie. AI doesn't grasp those layers of meaning.
Ethical and Societal Implications.
Now, let's talk ethics. Emotionally intelligent AI could be used for good, like supporting mental health. But it could also be used to manipulate us. Imagine ads tailored to exploit your emotions or political campaigns that play on your fears. That’s a bit scary, right?
And there's the issue of bias. AI systems learn from data, which can be biased. If AI isn’t carefully monitored, it could reinforce stereotypes and inequalities. Making sure AI is fair and ethical is a huge challenge.
The Irreplaceable Human Touch.
At the end of the day, there's something irreplaceable about human interaction. Real empathy involves shared experiences and understanding that goes beyond data and algorithms. Human relationships thrive on authenticity and trust, which are built over time through genuine emotional connections.
In a nutshell.
So, can AI truly mimic human emotional intelligence? The short answer is no, not completely. AI can simulate aspects of it, making our tech interactions smoother and sometimes more supportive. But the depth, complexity, and genuine emotional understanding that come with being human are things that AI just can't replicate.
As AI continues to evolve, it’s essential to recognize its limitations and ensure it enhances, rather than replaces, the rich tapestry of human emotional intelligence. The future of AI and EI lies in working together, where AI helps us out but doesn’t take over the unique and irreplaceable essence of being human.
What do you think? Can AI ever truly "feel" like we do? Let's keep the conversation going!
References
Newman, M. (2009). Emotional Capitalists: The New Leaders. Wiley.
Turkle, S. (2011). Alone Together: Why We Expect More from Technology and Less from Each Other. Basic Books.
McStay, A. (2018). Emotional AI: The Rise of Empathic Media. SAGE Publications.
Sarsam, S. M., & Al-Samarraie, H. (2018). Towards Incorporating Emotional Intelligence into Artificial Intelligence Systems: A Literature Review. Journal of Intelligent & Fuzzy Systems, 34(2), 895-903.
Zuboff, S. (2019). The Age of Surveillance Capitalism: The Fight for a Human Future at the New Frontier of Power. PublicAffairs.
Eubanks, V. (2018). Automating Inequality: How High-Tech Tools Profile, Police, and Punish the Poor. St. Martin's Press.
The Pandemic’s Impact On Social-Emotional Well-Being In Youth
The impact that the pandemic had on the social-emotional well-being of young people is profound. Many people were isolated for long periods and this meant missing out on vital opportunities to develop social skills, especially in children.
Adults talk about how difficult it was to return to work and social situations and many people battled the reverse shock of lockdown as we navigated our way back to the new normal. The toll it has taken on our youth is significant and far-reaching.
The stress and uncertainty during the pandemic, the increased screen time, changes to routine, exercise, diet, sleep and forced isolation corroded core interpersonal skills and the struggle to pick them up where they left off is real.
Our kids need us in their corner more than ever, so how can we help them?
Mary-Anne Murphy
The impact that the pandemic had on the social-emotional well-being of young people is profound. Many people were isolated for long periods and this meant missing out on vital opportunities to develop social skills, especially in children.
Adults talk about how difficult it was to return to work and social situations and many people battled the reverse shock of lockdown as we navigated our way back to the new normal. The toll it has taken on our youth is significant and far-reaching.
The stress and uncertainty during the pandemic, the increased screen time, changes to routine, exercise, diet, sleep and forced isolation corroded core interpersonal skills and the struggle to pick them up where they left off is real.
Our kids need us in their corner more than ever, so how can we help them?
Growing up in lockdown
“During the pandemic, children had to change the way they learn, play and socialise, all the while living in an environment of widespread uncertainty and anxiety.” Dr Dumuid, UniSA
Children are like trees. When they are seeds they need to be nourished in a warm environment as they find their roots, growing in a small pot. When the tree gets too big for the seed pot, it needs to be moved to a bigger pot, perhaps with a stake to help guide the trunk as it grows tall.
Eventually, it will be planted out into the ground, with strong roots and a long straight trunk, ready to deepen its roots and branch out on its own.
Some children who grew up in lockdown have become seeds in pots that were never planted in the ground.
Their root system is tightly compacted and hasn’t been given the space to develop and grow. The trunk is thin and underdeveloped, and the tree's growth is stunted.
The root system missed a vital growth phase and while it can be planted in the ground, is going to need extra care and guidance to flourish.
Social Emotional Wellbeing in Youth
Even years later, the pandemic continues to impact young people.
“Mental Health (Anxiety, Depression, Stress) remained the main issue New Zealand youth were faced with, Social Media was the second top issue. In-person counselling and phone helplines played a pivotal role in supporting our youth. COVID-19 had a profound effect on how young people felt about themselves and the world around them, and a range of issues rose to the fore. Rainbow youth had a heightened response to the pandemic.” State of the Generation Youthline report, July 2023
Young people who went through the pandemic are still struggling with social anxiety, higher levels of depression and behavioural difficulties. With a global recession following the pandemic and rising costs of living teens and students are starting to have bigger worries about their future.
Help your teens get their social groove back by limiting their screen time with a digital detox.
Get them out of their rooms and go on outings. Encourage them to try a new hobby, or do something creative that interests them like an art class where they can get out and meet new people who are interested in the same things.
Take it slow and don’t force the issue, but don’t ignore it because it is too hard or they just want to stay in their rooms.
Tips on Restoring Social Skills
Good interpersonal relationships are built from face-to-face interactions. Lots of young people feel like they lost some of their social skills during the pandemic. It quickly became a way of life to rely on digital messaging and lots of kids are struggling with the return to social interactions.
Here are some tips that can help everyone to restore those social skills.
Greet people, and get into the habit of saying hello as you pass other people, they might feel just as awkward as you
Make a point of looking people in the eye when you introduce yourself and the person with you
Start conversations, about anything, don’t overthink it. It gets easier each time and soon it will feel more natural - practice makes perfect.
Pick neutral topics to get the conversation started, such as the weather, or the other person's dog.
Don’t give up, even if talking to people feels uncomfortable.
Being social is a skill. You can help your child get back into practice and feel more comfortable seeing people face-to-face or being in a group.
Work with Us
Momentum Learning has been supporting Leaders, Teams, Teachers, Rangatahi and their Whānau to develop their social and emotional intelligence since 2020. Talk to us about exploring this for your organisation.
Let’s work together.
How EI is the secret sauce of leadership
Emotional Intelligence is the undisputed secret sauce of the greatest leaders. Just like adding chocolate sauce to an ice cream transforms plain vanilla ice cream into something extra special.
EI (Emotional Intelligence) is exactly that. It is the set of skills that can catapult managers into the stratosphere, turning them into change-makers and leaders.
So what exactly is this secret sauce?
Mary-Anne Murphy
Emotional Intelligence is the undisputed secret sauce of the greatest leaders. Just like adding chocolate sauce to an ice cream transforms plain vanilla ice cream into something extra special.
EI (Emotional Intelligence) is exactly that. It is the set of skills that can catapult managers into the stratosphere, turning them into change-makers and leaders.
So what exactly is this secret sauce?
EI is a framework of skills, a toolkit, that helps leaders realise their ultimate potential through a lens of deep empathy, self-awareness and empowerment that far outweighs any traditional leadership knowledge base.
“(IQ & TQ) x EQ = Leadership Potential. Leadership potential is the product of cognitive intelligence (IQ) and technical skills (TQ) and is maximised by high emotional intelligence or EQ.” Dr Martyn Newman, RocheMartin
Social-emotional agility
If we look at the tennis player, Roger Federer, he is a prime example of how someone uses their emotional agility to their advantage. His vast technical knowledge and level of skill in the field of tennis is undeniable.
Armed with natural talent, combined with a good education, intellect and the very best tennis coaching, he is very easily in a class of his own.
But possessing an impressive level of TQ (technical skill) is by and large not the only thing that sets him apart. It’s his emotional agility and high level of EI that have directly contributed to him being one of the best tennis players in history.
His heightened level of self-awareness and adaptability along with his ability to control his emotions through an exceptional level of self-management, means he can get the best out of himself under pressure, using his social-emotional agility to create the outcome he wants.
IQ vs EQ
59% of hiring managers said they wouldn’t employ someone with a high IQ and low EI.
71% of employers say they value Emotional Intelligence over IQ. CareerBuilder Survey, 2011.
Think about the most recent job interview you have been in and what kind of questions they asked you. You might have had more questions about problem-solving and how you approached difficult situations or challenging personalities than questions about the actual technical skills required to do the job.
While technical knowledge, experience and expertise are an important part of specific roles, being able to work effectively as part of a diverse team is becoming critically important.
Companies know that they can teach people the skills they need to do a job, so they favour hiring someone with a higher EQ over someone with a higher IQ.
Building Confidence in Leadership with EI
Confidence is plain and simply a learned skill.
Confident people trust their intuition, rely on their internal framework, and lean into it as a resource. It helps them make decisions, take initiative, assert themselves with clarity and communicate boundaries.
They’re in tune with a high level of self-awareness, can understand and regulate their emotions but above all else, have a strong bond of trust within themselves.
“You can’t lead a cavalry charge if you think you look funny on a horse.” John Peers, CEO & Chairman at Lightfleet
It will be impossible to lead a team to the next level if leaders are riddled with self-doubt, can’t have difficult conversations without regulating their emotions or cannot create and communicate boundaries with difficult people.
EI skills are a sought-after and valuable asset for anyone in a leadership role and it’s never too late to develop them.
Work with Us
Momentum Learning has been supporting Leaders, Teams, Teachers, Rangatahi and their Whānau to develop their social and emotional intelligence since 2020. Talk to us about exploring this for your organisation.
Let’s work together.