The Delegation Dilemma

The Delegation Dilemma

You’ve planned your week. Prioritised. Blocked time for deep work.
And yet… you’re still buried.
Still in the weeds.
Still the go-to when things go sideways.

What’s going on?
Chances are—you’re not really delegating.
Not fully. Not effectively.

The Doing-It-All Trap

You care. You’re capable.
And honestly—it feels quicker to just do it yourself.

But the cost?

•  Less time for strategy

• Constant reactivity

•  Missed growth for your team

What Delegation Isn’t

✘ Dumping tasks without context
✘ Hoping for the best
✘ Hovering “just in case”

What Delegation Is

Clear: “Here’s the outcome—and why it matters.”
Supportive: “What do you need to feel confident?”
Imperfect: “Done and learning beats perfect and stuck.”
Connected: “Let’s check in—what would be helpful to cover?”

The Mindset Shift

Leadership isn’t about doing more.
It’s about creating the conditions for others to thrive.

That means stepping back—even when you could step in.
Trusting. Releasing. Creating space.

Ask Yourself:

→  Am I actually delegating—or just redistributing?
→  What am I holding that someone else could grow through?
→  What would happen if I trusted more—and held on less?

Your value isn’t in how much you carry.
It’s in what you make possible.

Start there.
Lead with trust.

Go well this week,
MA :-)

Coaching on the Fly - Everyday moments. Lasting impact.

Coaching on the Fly
Everyday moments. Lasting impact.

Coaching doesn’t only happen in scheduled sessions with frameworks and flipcharts.
More often, it’s in the unscripted, in-between moments:

•  A check-in by the kettle.

•  A walk back from a meeting.

•  A quick chat in the corridor.

These moments—when we’re present, curious, and intentional—can shift thinking, unlock insight, and build trust.

It’s not about having all the answers.
It’s about asking the right question at the right time.

• “What was going through your mind just then?”

• “Want to unpack that a bit?”

• “What did you do differently this time?”

• “What’s one bold move you haven’t explored yet?”

These nudges support reflection without needing a sit-down.
They make learning part of the culture, not just the calendar.

So next time you're in the in-between, ask yourself:
Is this a moment for coaching?

Because two minutes can change everything.

MA :-)

Beyond Advice - When your worth starts riding on someone else’s results.

Beyond Advice
When your worth starts riding on someone else’s results.

It happens quietly.
You give guidance. Share your experience. Cheer them on.
You want them to succeed—of course you do.
But somewhere along the way, their wins start to feel like your validation.
And their struggles? Like a reflection on you.

The Weight We Carry

It sounds like:
“If they succeed, I’ve done well.”
“If they fail, I didn’t do enough.”
That’s a heavy (and false) story.

Signs it’s creeping in:
– Feeling responsible for their lack of progress
– Over-functioning to make sure they “get there”
– Sharing advice that’s more about your need to help than their need to grow
– Feeling deflated when things go off track

The Shift

Real leadership isn’t about owning the outcome.
It’s about walking alongside—grounded, present, and clear.

From pressure → to presence

• “How can I support them to trust their own thinking?”

• “Can I stay anchored in my purpose, not their pace?”

From fixing → to facilitating

• “What strengths do they already have?”

• “What feels right for them right now?”
  
  

From outcome → to ownership

• “This is their journey. I’m here, not carrying—just walking beside.”

Your Worth ≠ Their Results

Leadership isn’t about delivering success through others.
It’s about creating space for others to grow.

So if you’re carrying someone else’s progress like it’s your own—pause. Breathe.
Offer presence, not pressure.
Support, not solutions.
Trust, not control.

You are not their transformation.
You are the steady hand, the quiet voice, the guide.

And that? That’s enough.

Keep showing up.
Keep growing.
 

Keep smiling.
MA :-)

Giving Feedback Without Fear “Will you still like me tomorrow?”

Giving Feedback Without Fear
“Will you still like me tomorrow?”

It’s the quiet question that often sits behind feedback conversations—especially when we care.

We don’t want to hurt feelings.
We don’t want to be seen as cold.
So we soften… sidestep… stay silent.

But holding back isn’t kindness.
It’s comfort.

Real feedback—clear, respectful, and rooted in care—is how we grow.

Why it Matters

Avoiding feedback creates false peace.
In the short term, it feels safe.
Over time, it breeds confusion, resentment, and mistrust.

Without feedback, people don’t know how they’re doing—or what’s expected.
And the longer we wait, the harder the conversation becomes.

How to Give Feedback That Lands

• Anchor in care, not control
  “I’m sharing this because I believe in you.”
  
  

• Be clear and kind
  “I noticed [specific behaviour]—and I think it’s getting in the way of [outcome]. Let’s talk.”
  
  

• Focus on impact, not intent
  “When that happened, here’s how it affected the team.”
  
  

• Leave room for response
  “How does that land with you?”
  “Is there anything I’ve missed?”
  
  

• Stay in relationship
  Feedback isn’t about being right—it’s about being real and respectful.

Letting Go of the Fear

That little voice—“Will they still like me?”—may never fully go away.
But we can learn to hold it lightly.

Because when feedback comes from belief in someone’s potential, it deepens trust.
It says: I see you. I care enough to be honest. I believe you can grow.

So next time you hesitate, ask:
→ Is this about their comfort—or mine?
→ What does clarity and care look like here?

Feedback done well isn’t about being liked tomorrow.
It’s about who they’ll become because you chose courage today.

Let’s keep showing up with honesty, heart, and humanity.
Even when it’s uncomfortable—especially then.

Go with courage and compassion,
MA :-)

Breaking the Busyness Cycle. When your worth feels tied to rescuing others

Breaking the Busyness Cycle. When your worth feels tied to rescuing others

When Sarah stepped into leadership, she was known for being helpful, reliable, and always available.
Need a last-minute fix? She was there.
Someone struggling? She stepped in.
Team running behind? She stayed late.

From the outside, it looked like commitment.
On the inside, she was exhausted.

The Hidden Pattern

Sarah took on tasks that weren’t hers.
Apologised for setting boundaries.
Joined meetings she didn’t need to be in.
All driven by a quiet belief:
“If I’m not fixing this, I’m not adding value.”

Her self-worth had quietly become tied to her busyness.
And the more she rescued, the more the cycle reinforced itself.

The Shift

In a coaching conversation, I asked:
“What might happen if you didn’t step in?”

It was uncomfortable. She feared letting people down.
But she gave it a go—with small shifts:

 🔸 “Is this mine to do?”
🔸 “Am I helping—or holding someone back?”
🔸 “What does support look like, without doing it all myself?”

From Rescuing to Empowering

Here’s what Sarah practised:

Pause before jumping in
→ “What do you need from me?”
→ “What have you already tried?”

Redefine the role
From fixer to facilitator. From solving problems to building problem-solvers.

Challenge the story
→ “I don’t need to be busy to be valuable.”
→ “My value is in the space and clarity I create—for others and for myself.”

The Impact

Slowly, things changed.
Her team stepped up.
Her time became more focused.
Her energy came back.

She didn’t care less. She just stopped proving her worth through overdoing.

The Takeaway

The busyness cycle is sneaky—especially when we care.
But leadership isn’t about doing it all.
It’s about knowing when to lean in, and when to let go.

So if you feel stuck in fix-it mode, ask:
“What might happen if I didn’t jump in this time?”

You might just find that stepping back is the boldest move forward.

Go well this week,
MA :-)