In a famous experiment, researchers Daniel Simons and Christopher Chabris asked people to do exactly that. Halfway through, a person in a gorilla suit walked into the middle of the scene, thumped their chest and walked off. About half the viewers never saw it.
They weren’t careless. They were focused. Psychologists call this inattentional blindness: missing something obvious because your attention is fully taken up elsewhere.
What we’re busy counting decides what we never see.
In a team meeting, the gorilla is usually the conversation nobody is having.
All of us have default settings. Some of us scan for risk, others for people, others for the task list. Each setting is useful, and each can hide a gorilla.
Emotional intelligence is a question of focus. Inner focus helps you notice your own default. Other focus turns your attention to the people around you: what they’re feeling, what they need, what they can see that you can’t. Outer focus widens the lens to the whole scene: the pressures, systems and conditions your team is working in.
Four ways to spot the gorilla:
Notice your default. What do you notice first when you walk into a room: risk, people or task?
Ask someone with a different default. Before a big decision, ask one colleague what they’d flag. They’re a gift, not a nuisance.
Pause before deciding. Ask, “What might I be missing here?”
Change your vantage point. Sit in a different seat, walk the floor or read the email as the person receiving it.
Questions to sit with:
What are you so busy counting that you might be missing something?
Whose perspective would help you see the whole scene?
