Mary-Anne Murphy Mary-Anne Murphy

Mastering our Mindset Mountains

Sir Edmund Hillary once said “It’s not the mountain we conquer, but ourselves”.

In today’s fast-moving, unpredictable world, managing tasks and responsibilities is only part of what it takes to be at your best. True success, especially in tough times, depends on how well we build our own inner strength. This is where psychological capital (PsyCap) comes into play. Originally developed by Fred Luthans, Bruce Avolio, and Carolyn Youssef in their pioneering research on positive psychology in the workplace, PsyCap centres around four core psychological resources: self-efficacy, optimism, hope and resilience.

Think of it as your mental toolkit—designed to help you navigate challenges, adapt to change, and stay focused, even when things don’t go as planned.

So, how do you go about building your own psychological capital? Let’s break it down.

What is Psychological Capital?

PsyCap is about cultivating a positive mindset that helps you perform well, regardless of the obstacles. It’s made up of four key components:

  1. Self-efficacy: The belief that you can take on tasks and reach your goals.

  2. Optimism: A positive outlook that helps you see opportunities in setbacks.

  3. Hope: The drive to pursue your goals and the ability to find different ways to achieve them.

  4. Resilience: The ability to bounce back from difficulties and keep moving forward.

Building these traits within yourself is about more than just coping; it’s about actively growing and getting stronger in the process.

How You Can Build Your Own Psychological Capital

Here’s some ideas on  how you might reflect on and develop each part of your psychological capital:

1. Self-Efficacy: Building Confidence in Your Own Abilities

Self-efficacy is about trusting yourself to handle challenges and achieve your goals. We all have moments where doubt creeps in, especially when something new or difficult comes our way. But by building on small successes, you can gradually strengthen that belief in yourself.

Questions to Reflect On:

  • Do you believe you can overcome challenges, or do you tend to question your abilities?

  • How can you break down your goals into smaller steps to experience regular wins?

  • Are you taking time to acknowledge your achievements, even the small ones, to reinforce your confidence?

2. Optimism: Seeing the Opportunity in Challenges

Optimism isn’t about pretending everything’s perfect. It’s about seeing the possibilities, even when things don’t go to plan. Being optimistic helps you stay solution-focused and positive, especially in challenging times.

Questions to Reflect On:

  • When things don’t go your way, do you find yourself fixating on the negatives, or can you see the bigger picture?

  • How can you start reframing setbacks as learning opportunities, rather than barriers?

  • Are you intentionally surrounding yourself with influences that support a positive outlook, instead of those that drag you down?

3. Hope: Staying Motivated and Flexible

Hope is what keeps you going, even when the road gets rocky. It’s about having the motivation to reach your goals and the flexibility to find new paths when the original one isn’t working.

Questions to Reflect On:

  • Are your goals clear and meaningful enough to keep you motivated?

  • When one approach isn’t working, how can you shift your thinking and explore different ways to succeed?

  • What strategies help you maintain hope during long periods of uncertainty or challenge?

4. Resilience: Bouncing Back from Setbacks

Resilience is the ability to recover from difficulties and come back stronger. It’s what keeps you going when life throws a curveball (or five). The key to resilience is not just “powering through” but also learning from setbacks and using that knowledge to move forward.

Questions to Reflect On:

  • When faced with a setback, how do you typically respond? Are you able to regroup and refocus, or does it derail your progress?

  • Are you giving yourself time and space to process challenges, or are you trying to fix everything immediately?

  • What tools or habits can you build into your routine to help you recover from difficult situations more effectively?

Bringing It All Together

Psychological capital isn’t just an abstract concept—it’s a set of skills you can actively build within yourself. By focusing on self-efficacy, optimism, hope, and resilience, you’ll become better equipped to handle life’s ups and downs, both personally and professionally.

This process takes time and reflection, but it’s worth the effort. There will be moments when things feel tough and your resilience is tested. But with intentional focus on building your psychological capital, you’ll find yourself bouncing back more quickly, staying more motivated, and facing challenges with confidence.

Take a moment to reflect on these areas. Think about where you’re already strong and where you might need a bit more attention. Building your psychological capital is an ongoing process, but the payoff is becoming more confident, motivated, and resilient in the face of whatever life throws your way.


You’ve got this! Go well this week,
MA :-)

P.S. We have a few spaces still available for our Strategic Planning Day in December. This is a personal invitation to you and your leadership team to join us for a day to review and craft your strategic goals, initiatives, and annual plan. I will facilitate and guide the process as you work with your leadership team, surrounded by other leaders, to analyse your data, synthesise your consultation documentation, share ideas, make connections, optimise AI to support your thinking, and leave with a draft annual plan.

It will be a day of dedicated mahi to get things done. You may also choose to stay the night before and join us for dinner. You'll be in the beautiful surroundings of Waihi Beach School, with the beach only a stone's throw away.


Contact me directly to book your spots.

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Mary-Anne Murphy Mary-Anne Murphy

Planning ahead…

As we know, the education sector is undergoing many changes. Understanding what these changes mean for your setting and planning a pathway forward can seem like a daunting task.

This time of year is also when, as leaders, we begin to review our journey and look ahead to the next few years from a strategic perspective.

You might be a leader in a smaller context, feeling isolated and overwhelmed by the changes, wondering how best to navigate them. Or perhaps you have a team of leaders around you, where finding uninterrupted time to think is a rarity. When speaking with a principal I work alongside, she shared how helpful our retreats over the past two years have been. These retreats allowed her and her leadership team to get off-site, into a lovely setting with great kai, and dedicate time to strategic thinking and planning, which has set them up for success. She suggested, "How about we open this up to others to join us in another context?" And so, the idea was born!

This is a personal invitation to you and your leadership team to join us for a day at the end of the year to review and craft your strategic goals, initiatives, and annual plan. I will facilitate and guide the process as you work with your leadership team, surrounded by other leaders, to analyze your data, synthesise your consultation documentation, share ideas, make connections, optimise AI to support your thinking, and leave with a draft strategic and annual plan.

It will be a day of dedicated mahi to get things done. You may also choose to stay the night before and join us for dinner. You'll be in the beautiful surroundings of Waihi Beach School, with the beach only a stone's throw away.

Contact me directly to book your spots.

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Mary-Anne Murphy Mary-Anne Murphy

Pendulum Swings 'n Things.

It’s not unknown in the wider Aotearoa, New Zealand context, that there are some shake-ups within the education sector.

Structured approaches have become the ‘new’ dialogue, common practice models considered and page, or slide numbers the potential next learning tool.

Now, don’t get me wrong—I see the merits in parts of this movement. But in this post, I want to share some thoughts that have been simmering in my mind for a few months. My aim is to provoke thought and dialogue (definitely not to invite trolling or personal attacks, to be clear!).


I’ll explore this within two key areas. So here goes…

Is a programme-approach programming our teachers?

Some structured learning approaches are, for lack of a better term, highly regimented. The 'paint-it-done' approach is starting to resemble a 'paint-by-numbers' method, with strict guidelines, prescribed movements, and somewhat rigid plans.

We know from cognitive load theory that consistent approaches are essential when learning something new. However, based on my experiences working alongside schools, I’m beginning to wonder—are we unintentionally stifling our teachers' ability to think independently? Let me explain. If teachers are conditioned to follow a particular approach, to what extent are they losing the ability to think for themselves, address individual needs without the fear of straying from the programme, or use their creativity to craft engaging lessons tailored to their wonderfully unique learners?
I am already seeing this rigidity within the education sector, and it concerns me.

My wondering is, are we once again throwing the baby out with the bathwater?


Are we educating our learners for our past, or their future?

When co-presenting at the recent International Conference on Thinking in Melbourne, I was fortunate to listen to some incredible speakers. They ranged from neuroscientists, indigenous leaders, doctors, philosophers, educational researchers, to name a few.

A topic that stood out was the role of AI in education today.

One thought that has been on my mind since then is whether our current educational approach is remedial or accelerated. Are we simply filling gaps and moving slowly to go fast later, or are we embracing the new world and fast-forwarding across barriers to accelerate learning? Like many parents, I have a son with dyslexia. And like many other parents (with the added layer of being a teacher), I trained in SPELD, collaborated closely with his teachers, and did everything I could to support his learning. But when he entered a school that provided him with a Chromebook to capture his thoughts and assist with spelling, everything changed! The barriers that had once hindered his learning were lifted through the introduction of tools that allowed him to engage with his world. Today, at 28, he runs a thriving engineering business, excels in the share market, and reads voraciously online. With AI's introduction, these barriers are being removed even further.

So, my second question is, whose future are we really preparing our children for?

As I wrap up this piece, I want to reiterate that this is a thought-piece intended to provoke reflection and dialogue. I have a foot in both camps, but I believe it's crucial that we continue to question, discuss, and explore as we navigate this journey.

Drop me a line and share your respectful thinking. 🙂

Arohanui

MA :-)

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Mary-Anne Murphy Mary-Anne Murphy

From Flux to Focus.

In today's world, change is constant. Whether it's the environment, the people around us, or the political landscape, we all face an ever-shifting reality. This sense of flux can be felt especially in the workplace, where the pressures of the season and the demands of our roles can sometimes weigh heavily on us.

During the winter months, there's often a noticeable shift in energy levels. People may feel more tired, stressed, or even a bit withdrawn. These are natural responses to both the season and the challenges we face. However, it's important to recognise that when we're not operating at our best, it can affect those around us. This can lead to misunderstandings, tension, and even strain on relationships.

But there is a way to navigate these challenges with resilience and positivity. By taking a moment to reflect and ask a few key questions, we can prevent this state of flux from leading to fall-outs:

  • What do you know for sure? Identifying the certainties in a situation helps to ground us and provides a solid foundation to build upon.

  • What can you do to help? Offering support or solutions not only benefits others but also creates a positive ripple effect in the workplace.

  • What would great look like? Visualising success helps to align efforts and inspires everyone to work toward a common goal.

  • What can you do next to add value? Taking proactive steps, no matter how small, can make a significant difference and keep momentum going in the right direction.

By focusing on what we can control and taking positive action, we can navigate even the most challenging times with grace and strength. The key is to remain adaptable, supportive, and forward-thinking, ensuring that we all move through this period of flux together, stronger than before.

Are you thinking about 2025?

Take a sneak peak at our 2025 offerings.
Contact Mary-Anne to find out more.

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Mary-Anne Murphy Mary-Anne Murphy

Understanding our Ego-states in Leadership.

Within my recent Positive Psychology studies (yes, another qualification!) I have delved into many areas of interest in relation to life and leadership.
One area that has me currently buzzing with thought comes from the field of Transactional Analysis, particularly the concept of ego states, and how it relates to our mahi as leaders.

Let me explain a bit more…

Within Transactional Analysis, the concept of ego states of Parent, Adult and Child speaks about the ego-space from which we may be operating at any given time. Being aware of these spaces not only influences our own self-awareness, it also supports us to understand how one’s ego state can influence others. In leadership, a leader's predominant ego state can significantly affect team members' responses and behaviours, shaping the overall team dynamic.

At any given time, we might find ourselves, or consciously choose to operate, from either a Parent, Child, or an Adult state. Each state, or positioning has some behavioural tendencies, which can also provoke certain reciprocal behaviours from others. Furthermore, when aware of our own position, we can also optimise this to support those we lead to level-up their own state.

The different Ego States and their influence on Others

1. Parent Ego State

  • Nurturing Parent Influence: When a leader predominantly operates from the Nurturing Parent state, they offer support, reassurance, and encouragement. This can create a secure and positive environment where team members feel valued and cared for. Such an atmosphere often encourages employees to take risks, share ideas, and feel more connected to the team, fostering a sense of loyalty and motivation.
    However, an overemphasis on the Nurturing Parent state can sometimes lead to dependency, and cause others to shift into child-state. Team members might become overly reliant on the leader for support and validation, potentially hindering their ability to work independently and take initiative.

  • Critical Parent Influence: Leaders operating from the Critical Parent state can be effective in setting standards, maintaining discipline, and ensuring compliance with rules and procedures. This can be beneficial in environments where structure and adherence to protocols are crucial.
    However, if used excessively, the Critical Parent state can create a restrictive and intimidating atmosphere. Team members may feel judged, criticised, or micromanaged, leading to a decrease in morale and creativity. It can also trigger defensive or rebellious responses, activating the Adapted Child state in team members, where they either comply reluctantly or resist authority.

2. Child Ego State

  • Natural Child Influence: A leader who frequently engages the Natural Child state can inspire creativity, spontaneity, and a playful approach to problem-solving. This can lead to a more open and innovative team culture, where members feel free to express their ideas without fear of judgement. The Natural Child state can encourage others to also tap into their creative potential and embrace a more dynamic and flexible approach to work.
    However, if a leader excessively exhibits behaviours associated with the Natural Child, such as impulsiveness or lack of discipline, it can lead to a lack of structure and focus. Team members might struggle to find direction and consistency, potentially resulting in decreased productivity and increased confusion.

  • Adapted Child Influence: If a leader exhibits traits of the Adapted Child state, such as excessive compliance or avoidance of confrontation, it may lead to an environment where issues are not addressed openly. Team members might mirror this behaviour, resulting in suppressed opinions and unaddressed conflicts. Alternatively, they might respond with their own Critical Parent state, stepping into a more dominant role to compensate for the perceived lack of leadership.

3. Adult Ego State

The Adult state is neutral and objective, focused on data, facts, and rational thinking. Leaders operating from this state promote a balanced and fair work environment. They are likely to encourage open communication, critical thinking, and a collaborative approach to problem-solving. This encourages team members to also engage their Adult state, leading to more effective and rational decision-making within the team.

The Adult state helps to mediate between the Parent and Child states, creating a stabilising influence that can diffuse potential conflicts and encourage constructive interactions. By modelling Adult behaviours, leaders can help team members develop their own Adult responses, fostering a culture of respect, responsibility, and logical thinking.

How might I apply this and what do I need to be aware of?

Matching and Mismatching States: You can intentionally match your ego state to that of your team members to build rapport or deliberately mismatch to redirect the interaction. Let’s have a look at a couple of examples:

Matching States: Suppose a team member is feeling overwhelmed with a project and starts acting from a Child state, expressing frustration and helplessness. You can match their state by adopting a Nurturing Parent response, offering reassurance and empathy. "I understand this project feels challenging right now. Let’s take a step back and break it down together. You’re doing great, and we’ll get through this."

Mismatching States: If a team member is acting rebelliously and refusing to follow procedures, they are in a Child state. Instead of responding with authority from a Critical Parent state, which might escalate the situation, you can adopt the Adult state. Provide calm, rational guidance: "I see you're frustrated with the current procedures. Let's discuss why they're important and how we can make this process smoother for everyone."


Awareness and Adaptability: A key aspect of effective leadership is the awareness of your own ego state and the ability to recognise and adapt to the states of others. By being mindful of how your ego state influences your team, you can better manage team dynamics, encourage positive behaviours, and mitigate potential conflicts. A couple of examples of this might be:

Leader Awareness: During a meeting, you notice you are operating from a Critical Parent state, setting strict deadlines and expectations. Recognising that some team members are reacting defensively, you consciously shift to an Adult state, encouraging open discussion about the challenges and seeking their input on the deadlines. "I understand the deadlines are tight. Let's talk about any obstacles you’re facing and see how we can address them together."

Leader Adaptability: A team member typically operates from an Adapted Child state, always agreeing and avoiding confrontation. You recognise this and adapt your approach by gently encouraging them to share their true opinions. "I appreciate your willingness to go along with the plan, but your insights are valuable. What do you really think about this strategy? Your perspective could help us improve."

Encouraging Growth: You can use your understanding of Transactional Analysis to foster personal and professional growth within your team. This can be particularly helpful if you feel you are doing it all.

For example: You notice that some team members often defer to you for decision-making. To foster their growth, you encourage them to operate more from their Adult state. During a team meeting, instead of providing all the answers, you pose questions that promote self-awareness and critical thinking. "What do you think is the best approach to tackle this issue? How do you suggest we proceed based on the data we have?" This approach helps them develop their problem-solving skills and confidence in making decisions.


When we are aware-of, and understand each of these states as leaders, we are then able to lead more consciously and purposefully. We can also start to realise when others may be operating from different states that can pull us into an undesired state, and adapt our own positioning to manage this.

Leading is highly complex, and can be like a dance; sometimes a waltz, and other times a tango. In recognising the impact of our own ego state and those of our teams, we are able to create a balanced environment that fosters growth, creativity, and mutual respect. This approach not only enhances individual and team performance but also contributes to a healthier, more supportive workplace culture.

I’m excited to be launching our 2025 programmes soon. If you want to get a jump-start on your PLD planning, drop me a line.

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