Leading Through Personal Crisis: Maintaining Authenticity and Strength
Leading Through Personal Crisis: Maintaining Authenticity and Strength
Life doesn’t wait for a convenient time to throw challenges our way. Whether it’s grief, illness, family struggles, or personal setbacks, we often find ourselves juggling deep emotional burdens while still needing to show up for our teams, colleagues, and responsibilities. The pressure to ‘hold it together’ can be immense, but true leadership isn’t about pretending everything is fine—it’s about navigating these moments with honesty, self-compassion, and courage.
Marianne Williamson reminds us, “A leader is one who holds a space for the brilliance of others while not diminishing their own light.” That means we can acknowledge our struggles without losing our strength. And as Brené Brown teaches, vulnerability is not weakness—it’s the foundation of real connection and trust. If you’re leading through a personal crisis, here’s how to stay anchored in authenticity and resilience.
1. Speak to Someone You Trust
During difficult times, it’s tempting to push through alone, fearing we’ll be seen as weak or incapable. But Liz Gilbert reminds us, “Embrace the glorious mess that you are.” Finding a trusted colleague, leader, or mentor to confide in can be a game-changer.
Being open doesn’t mean sharing every detail; it means giving enough context so others understand. A simple, “I’m going through something challenging at the moment, and I may need to adjust how I work for a while,” invites support rather than isolation.
If you’re in a leadership role, modelling this openness creates a ripple effect. When others see that being honest about struggles is not only allowed but respected, it fosters a culture of trust, psychological safety, and care.
2. Use the Circles of Control Model
When we’re overwhelmed, it’s easy to focus on everything outside our control. The Circles of Control framework helps shift our energy:
Circle of Control: Your actions, boundaries, and self-care.
Circle of Influence: What you can impact but not directly control (team culture, workplace flexibility).
Circle of Concern: External factors you can’t change (other people’s reactions, larger systemic issues).
If you catch yourself spiralling into frustration or anxiety, ask: Am I focusing on what I can control, or am I getting stuck in what I can’t? Redirecting your energy to actionable steps—like adjusting your workload, setting clear boundaries, or asking for help—creates a sense of steadiness amidst uncertainty.
3. Find the Gift in the Grit
Hardship can feel meaningless when we’re in the thick of it, but Brené Brown encourages us to shift from “Why is this happening to me?” to “What is this teaching me?”
Similarly, Liz Gilbert writes about resilience as a muscle we build through life’s challenges. Instead of getting lost in the difficulty, try asking:
What strengths am I developing through this?
How can this experience make me a more empathetic and grounded leader?
What small steps can I take to move forward with grace?
This doesn’t mean minimising pain or pretending everything is fine. It means allowing yourself to sit with the struggle while also seeking its deeper lessons.
4. Adjust, Don’t Abandon, Your Well-being
Under stress, self-care is often the first thing we let go. But as Marianne Williamson says, “When you honour yourself, you honour everyone.” Prioritising small, consistent acts of self-care helps sustain your energy:
Ensuring rest, hydration, and nourishment.
Taking mindful breaks, even if just a short walk outside.
Keeping personal routines that ground you, even if adapted.
Self-care also means knowing when to pause. If you need to delegate, do it. If you need a break, take it. Strength isn’t about pushing through exhaustion—it’s about knowing when to rest and reset.
Leading Through Hard Times
True leadership isn’t about perfection—it’s about presence. When life gets hard, the best thing you can do is lead yourself with the same compassion and wisdom you offer others. Speak to someone you trust, focus on what’s within your control, and seek the hidden gifts within the challenge.
You don’t have to carry it all alone.
Arohanui,
Mary-Anne