When Team Tension Becomes Your Leadership Terrain

When Team Tension Becomes Your Leadership Terrain

Team tension doesn’t always arrive loudly.
Sometimes, it simmers.

A clipped tone.
A side glance.
The kind of silence that says more than words ever could.

You feel it.
And whether you name it or not, your team feels it too.

Ron Heifetz, in his work on adaptive leadership, reminds us that the toughest leadership work isn’t about technical fixes, it’s about staying present in the heat of discomfort.

“Real leadership is about helping people face challenges for which there are no easy answers, and staying with them while they find their way through.”

And that kind of leadership begins not with answers, but with curiosity.

When disconnection shows up, don’t delay.
You don’t need to call a full team reset.
You need to ask better questions.

Try gently naming what you’re sensing:

“How are things feeling in the team right now? Anything sitting under the surface?”
“What might we not be saying that needs to be said?”

Or bring focus to the unspoken patterns:

“Have there been moments recently that haven’t sat quite right?”
Where might we be contributing, even unintentionally, to how things are feeling?”

Sometimes, tension is a quiet invitation to reset the climate, not by controlling it, but by caring for it. That’s kaitiakitanga in action.

And while you don’t need to referee every ripple, you do have a responsibility to set the tone.
To help the team move from assumption to awareness.
From stuckness to shared ownership.

So ask:

“What would help us reconnect and work with more ease and trust?”
“How can we support each other in both the mahi and the messiness?”

And don’t forget to look inward:

“What’s one shift I could make this week that might change the energy in this space?”

You’re not expected to have all the answers.
But you are invited to lead the questions that matter.

Hold the space.
Don’t rush to fix.
Make room for truth, and for people to find their own footing again.

Thought Prompt:
What one conversation, if you initiated it this week, could shift the energy and restore connection in your team?

Back yourself.
Mary‑Anne