Mindfulness Tips for a Manic World
Ever feel like you're on a treadmill that's set to "full speed," and no matter how hard you run, the world just keeps moving faster? Yeah, me too. In today's world, where everything demands our attention all at once, it’s easy to feel overwhelmed. We're constantly juggling a million things—work, family, friends, hobbies (what are those again?), and the never-ending list of life admin. It’s like we’ve forgotten how to slow down and just be.
That’s where mindfulness comes in. It’s not about meditating for hours or transforming into a zen monk. No, mindfulness can be quick, easy, and fit into the cracks of your busy day. It's about being present in the moment, even when the world is whizzing past at lightning speed.
In fact, mindfulness is one of the key principles for managing emotional intelligence, as highlighted in RocheMartin's video series on mindfulness. It focuses on how this practice helps us gain greater control over our thoughts, manage stress better, and build resilience in everyday life. Martyn Newman, in his book The Mindfulness Book, also explains that mindfulness is the key to unlocking our ability to regulate emotions and improve focus. It’s not about being passive, but rather empowering ourselves to respond, rather than react, to life’s pressures. Let’s dive into a few practical ways to bring more mindfulness into your life.
1. Start with Your Breath
It sounds too simple to work, right? But honestly, it’s the fastest way to anchor yourself in the present moment. The next time you feel frazzled, pause for a moment and take a deep breath. Inhale slowly for four seconds, hold for four, then exhale for four. This is called box breathing, and it’s magic. Even just one or two rounds can calm your nervous system and help you regain focus.
2. Take Mindful Breaks
We’re all guilty of going from one task to another without a moment to breathe. Instead, try weaving short, mindful pauses into your day. Maybe it’s sitting quietly for a minute between meetings, or taking a mindful walk where you notice the colours, sounds, and smells around you. The key is to give your mind a mini-break to reset before plunging back into the chaos.
3. Ditch the Multitasking
I know, I know. We all believe we’re great at multitasking. But research shows that doing multiple things at once actually reduces our productivity and leaves us feeling more stressed. Martyn Newman, in his book, explains that mindfulness teaches us to focus on the task at hand. When we’re mindful, we increase our ability to concentrate, which means we do better work—and feel less frazzled. So, whether it’s writing an email, cooking dinner, or playing with your kids—be fully present in that moment. You’ll feel calmer, and weirdly enough, you’ll probably get things done faster too.
4. Mindful Eating
How often do we rush through meals, barely tasting our food as we scroll through social media or answer emails? Mindful eating is a game changer. Next time you sit down to eat, really taste your food. Notice the texture, the flavours, and how it feels in your mouth. Newman also highlights that this form of mindfulness can help us develop a better relationship with food, increase our awareness of our habits, and foster greater appreciation for everyday moments like mealtime.
5. Digital Detox
We live in an age where we're never more than a swipe away from an email, text, or notification. While it’s great to stay connected, it’s also exhausting. Consider carving out some time each day where you’re screen-free. Maybe it’s the first 30 minutes after you wake up or the hour before bed. Disconnecting from the digital world, even briefly, can help you reconnect with yourself. In The Mindfulness Book, Newman stresses the importance of these mindful breaks to help reset our mental state and reduce the constant overstimulation that modern technology brings.
6. Be Kind to Yourself
Mindfulness isn’t about getting it right all the time. It’s not another task on your to-do list. If you find your mind wandering, or you forget to breathe or take a break—don’t stress. Be gentle with yourself. As the RocheMartin video explains, mindfulness is about non-judgmental awareness. Just acknowledging that you’re trying is a huge step forward. Newman similarly reminds us that self-compassion is key in mindfulness practice. When we allow ourselves to be imperfect, we’re more likely to make lasting changes.
Remember, mindfulness isn’t about living a perfect life. It’s about noticing the present, appreciating the small moments, and being kind to yourself amidst the craziness. In a manic world, a little mindfulness can go a long way.
Incorporating mindfulness into your day can feel like a breath of fresh air in a hectic world. The beauty is, you don’t need hours of free time to make it happen—just a few mindful moments here and there can help you stay grounded and calm.
Go mindfully this week.
MA :-)
Space for 2025 is filling. Check out our 2025 programmes:
Empowered Students
Leadership Retreat
Next year there is no RAPLD funding.
Talk to us about applying for grant funding to support your mahi.
Contact Mary-Anne to discuss your needs.
The Pandemic’s Impact On Social-Emotional Well-Being In Youth
The impact that the pandemic had on the social-emotional well-being of young people is profound. Many people were isolated for long periods and this meant missing out on vital opportunities to develop social skills, especially in children.
Adults talk about how difficult it was to return to work and social situations and many people battled the reverse shock of lockdown as we navigated our way back to the new normal. The toll it has taken on our youth is significant and far-reaching.
The stress and uncertainty during the pandemic, the increased screen time, changes to routine, exercise, diet, sleep and forced isolation corroded core interpersonal skills and the struggle to pick them up where they left off is real.
Our kids need us in their corner more than ever, so how can we help them?
Mary-Anne Murphy
The impact that the pandemic had on the social-emotional well-being of young people is profound. Many people were isolated for long periods and this meant missing out on vital opportunities to develop social skills, especially in children.
Adults talk about how difficult it was to return to work and social situations and many people battled the reverse shock of lockdown as we navigated our way back to the new normal. The toll it has taken on our youth is significant and far-reaching.
The stress and uncertainty during the pandemic, the increased screen time, changes to routine, exercise, diet, sleep and forced isolation corroded core interpersonal skills and the struggle to pick them up where they left off is real.
Our kids need us in their corner more than ever, so how can we help them?
Growing up in lockdown
“During the pandemic, children had to change the way they learn, play and socialise, all the while living in an environment of widespread uncertainty and anxiety.” Dr Dumuid, UniSA
Children are like trees. When they are seeds they need to be nourished in a warm environment as they find their roots, growing in a small pot. When the tree gets too big for the seed pot, it needs to be moved to a bigger pot, perhaps with a stake to help guide the trunk as it grows tall.
Eventually, it will be planted out into the ground, with strong roots and a long straight trunk, ready to deepen its roots and branch out on its own.
Some children who grew up in lockdown have become seeds in pots that were never planted in the ground.
Their root system is tightly compacted and hasn’t been given the space to develop and grow. The trunk is thin and underdeveloped, and the tree's growth is stunted.
The root system missed a vital growth phase and while it can be planted in the ground, is going to need extra care and guidance to flourish.
Social Emotional Wellbeing in Youth
Even years later, the pandemic continues to impact young people.
“Mental Health (Anxiety, Depression, Stress) remained the main issue New Zealand youth were faced with, Social Media was the second top issue. In-person counselling and phone helplines played a pivotal role in supporting our youth. COVID-19 had a profound effect on how young people felt about themselves and the world around them, and a range of issues rose to the fore. Rainbow youth had a heightened response to the pandemic.” State of the Generation Youthline report, July 2023
Young people who went through the pandemic are still struggling with social anxiety, higher levels of depression and behavioural difficulties. With a global recession following the pandemic and rising costs of living teens and students are starting to have bigger worries about their future.
Help your teens get their social groove back by limiting their screen time with a digital detox.
Get them out of their rooms and go on outings. Encourage them to try a new hobby, or do something creative that interests them like an art class where they can get out and meet new people who are interested in the same things.
Take it slow and don’t force the issue, but don’t ignore it because it is too hard or they just want to stay in their rooms.
Tips on Restoring Social Skills
Good interpersonal relationships are built from face-to-face interactions. Lots of young people feel like they lost some of their social skills during the pandemic. It quickly became a way of life to rely on digital messaging and lots of kids are struggling with the return to social interactions.
Here are some tips that can help everyone to restore those social skills.
Greet people, and get into the habit of saying hello as you pass other people, they might feel just as awkward as you
Make a point of looking people in the eye when you introduce yourself and the person with you
Start conversations, about anything, don’t overthink it. It gets easier each time and soon it will feel more natural - practice makes perfect.
Pick neutral topics to get the conversation started, such as the weather, or the other person's dog.
Don’t give up, even if talking to people feels uncomfortable.
Being social is a skill. You can help your child get back into practice and feel more comfortable seeing people face-to-face or being in a group.
Work with Us
Momentum Learning has been supporting Leaders, Teams, Teachers, Rangatahi and their Whānau to develop their social and emotional intelligence since 2020. Talk to us about exploring this for your organisation.
Let’s work together.
The link between mental health and social-emotional intelligence
The link between social-emotional intelligence and mental health is significant. Our mental well-being is heavily influenced by our ability to navigate our social-emotional world. How we regulate our emotions, the people we choose as friends, and how we manage stress, solve problems and interact with others underpins the quality of our lives.
Mary-Anne Murphy
The link between social-emotional intelligence and mental health is significant. Our mental well-being is heavily influenced by our ability to navigate our social-emotional world. How we regulate our emotions, the people we choose as friends, and how we manage stress, solve problems and interact with others underpins the quality of our lives.
"Perhaps the problem isn’t that we have too much anxiety or depression, but that we’ve been taught to ignore the things that truly matter." Johann Hari, Lost Connections
EI for a better life
Think of mental health as the foundation of a building. A strong and secure base of safety and security from where every other aspect of life grows. A safe and dependable place that we lean into for extra support.
Now think of the structure of the building that is on top of the foundation. A well-designed structure and purpose-built building is strong, resilient and efficient. This is your social-emotional intelligence.
Good mental health gives people a strong and stable foundation for everything else. Our quality of life is entirely underpinned by the quality of our mental health. You can have the best structure on top, but if the foundation is lacking, then everything else will fall over.
A purpose-built social-emotional structure determines how we interact with others, and the relationships we build and nurture - it shapes the lens through which we interact with the world around us.
Even if our foundation is a bit wobbly or our structure has a few missing pieces, just like buildings can be renovated, people also have ways to repair, strengthen and enhance our lives. EI offers limitless possibilities for an improved quality of life, but it needs a strong foundation to lean on.
The first step in this life-long journey is self-awareness. Really looking at all of the cracks in the foundation and acknowledging that there are parts of our structure that need work, is a pivotal step in the right direction. And it is often the hardest of them all.
Community connection for anxiety and depression
“Loneliness isn’t the physical absence of other people, he said—it’s the sense that you’re not sharing anything that matters with anyone else.” ― Johann Hari, Lost Connections
So what use is a great building on a strong foundation if it is empty? It needs people who want to come and live, work and hang out in the building. Being connected to a community is one of the vital elements of mental wellbeing.
The first stage of the Four Stages of Psychological Safety (Timothy Clark) is inclusion. It is a fundamental human need to belong and to connect with others. When people feel included, they feel safe to share, learn and challenge the status quo. Community connection is directly linked to how people's mental health is supported.
Te whare tapa whā - five ways to well-being
Te whare tapa whā, developed by Sir Mason Durie in 1984, describes mental health and well-being as a wharenui (meeting house) that has four walls and a foundation.
The four walls represent pillars of what makes up our mental health and wellbeing and the foundation represents our community, our family, our roots.
The idea is that when all of these elements are in balance, our well-being thrives. When they are disconnected and out of balance, then we become disconnected and out of balance too.
Taha wairua
spiritual wellbeing
Taha hinengaro
mental and emotional wellbeing
Taha tinana
physical wellbeing
Taha whānau
family and social wellbeing
Whenua
land
"The endpoint is to have someone who is well in every sense of the word." Sir Mason Durie, creator of Te whare tapa whā
The relationship between EQ and mental health
The correlation between high levels of emotional intelligence and good mental health has a significant impact, that much is clear. So how do we get this, who teaches this to adults and where do people even start?
Because emotional-social learning is a model, a capability concept and a tool kit, all of the skills can be learned, developed and finessed. Anybody can be taught and learn these skills at any stage of their life.
Working with the expert facilitation of the skilled team at Momentum Learning can help individuals and teams develop and culturally locate these cross-cultural skills.
If you are interested in knowing more about EQ training for yourself, your team or your organisation, we would love to hear from you. Contact us today.
Work with Us
Momentum Learning has been supporting Leaders, Teams, Teachers, Rangatahi and their Whānau to develop their social and emotional intelligence since 2020. Talk to us about exploring this for your organisation.
Let’s work together.
The art of thinking fast and speaking slow
Thinking on your feet is a vital skill for a leader. Even more so when under pressure.
Being able to manage competing information, sense-make, synthesise and strategise, whilst also humaning are vital skills in any leader's kete.
Mary-Anne Murphy
Thinking on your feet is a vital skill for a leader. Even more so when under pressure.
Being able to manage competing information, sense-make, synthesise and strategise, whilst also humaning are vital skills in any leader's kete.
In his book Thinking, Fast and Slow, Daniel Kahneman states,
"Intelligence is not only the ability to reason; it is also the ability to find
relevant material in memory and to deploy attention when needed."
But, whilst thinking fast is a skill, speaking slow is the skill in action. Let me explain.
Although a leader may be able to think quickly through complex situations or pieces of information, the art is in communicating this in a carefully considered manner, as opposed to thinking fast and speaking fast.
There is an art in speaking slowly.
This art requires that leaders hold space, listen to understand, and are vitally careful with how they speak, when they speak, what they speak, the tone in which they speak and the clarity of their message. This is the art of speaking slowly.
Consider a time when you have been on the receiving end of some hurtful speaking. Often it has come from the limbic brain, charged with emotion and hastily conveyed to you. And, I am sure, you can even remember most of what was said it had that much of an impact on you. It is our response that can make or break a relationship. When we are able to think fast and speak with less haste, we can communicate in a way that sets boundaries, as well as being heard.
The art of thinking fast and speaking slowly underpins a leader's ability to build better relationships, build better communication skills, and build better teams.
Best-selling author Nancy Duarte explored this within her practice by recording herself in a meeting. What she noticed spurred her on a journey of self-discovery into unpacking where her think fast, speak fast modality came from, and its impact on how she led and those she led.
Interested? Perhaps begin by collating some data, either through voice recording or videoing a meeting, or gaining feedback from your colleagues. Then you can start to explore this within your own leadership.
I’ll meet you there!
The gap between emoting and feeling
On a recent trip to Melbourne, a couple of news events created debate. This then sparked a conversation about the gap between emoting and feeling. The comment was made that we emote so much about things, yet care so little about others.
Mary-Anne Murphy
On a recent trip to Melbourne, a couple of news events created debate.
One event was when a 14-year-old pushed an elderly man who was minding his own business off a pier. This event was filmed by the boy’s friends and laughter was heard as the man toppled into the water. Luckily, onlookers rescued the man who was struggling to swim. The boy was charged and sent to youth court.
Another story was from the Australian Tennis Open, where a change in rules allowed viewers to come and go from their seats at any time during play. One player spoke about the distraction this was causing to their game. They also detailed how tennis was their job, how they earned their income, and that you wouldn’t expect someone to be coming and going from a boardroom meeting.
This then sparked a conversation about the gap between emoting and feeling. The comment was made that we emote so much about things, yet care so little about others.
We are becoming people who are quick to voice our own opinions and needs, yet sometimes at the expense of the needs and feelings of others.
Is this true?
Have we become activists for ourselves, whilst minimising others?
Have we become self-absorbed and self-gratifying?
Are we spilling our emotions out without consideration for others?
Are we quick to troll someone who explores a topic counter to our beliefs?
Have we lost empathy for others?
This is a juicy topic to explore. I am interested in your respectful thoughts and experiences.